When I was a little kid my brother and I went through a period of some serious possessiveness. We would fight over things and demand the other person not touch what is OURS! Our parents oftentimes tried to help by buying us the exact same thing. One of us would usually mess up one of them with a scratch or whatever to show which one was ours! We felt like we owned our stuff and no one should touch it.
Our passions are something we need to own in our life. We need to understand that our passions are ours alone and take responsibility for them. Too often we will hear things explained away with the phrases, “That is just the way I am,” or “What’s the big deal, I’m not hurting anyone.” These statements recognize that we are giving up ownership and surrendering to our passions.
Owning our passion means we take responsibility for it. To live a full adventure we must know what we can and cannot do and take responsibility for every aspect of our life. People often shift blame for their out of control passions, but that never helps them. For example, people make excuses for overeating and their passion for food with statements like, “You just cook too good,” or “I’m not really that overweight!” These are ways we shift blame or make excuses.
Ownership comes as we look in the mirror and accept the fact that we make the choices. There may be many reasons behind the choices that we know or we don’t know but responsibility means we seek to solve the problem. We may need to get help and work hard, but that is what ownership looks like. We don’t expect the problem to just go away or be excused. We do something about it.
One of the best ways to focus our passion comes through focusing our passion with parameters. Parameters bring boundaries to our passion and force them to focus in a specific direction. For example, if food is a problem like we talked about earlier, we can set a parameter of not having Little Debbies in the house, or not going to all you can eat buffets. These are examples of parameters and how they help us with our passions.
Parameters are not easy in areas that are out of control. We will often need help and accountability. These are other ways of adding parameters. When you have a friend who can check on your or you can call when you feel weak, these will help you overcome. Parameters don’t take away your “fun,” they actually help you focus your passion towards long-term success.
Passions can be a great power source for your adventure as a man. They don’t have to sabotage your life. You can take ownership and set parameters and when you do, you will thrive!
If you want more insight into your passions, there is a free resource for you. Its called the 3 Day Dare and it will help you learn how to maximize your passions for power. You can go HERE to start.