A common theme in movies is getting the band back together. Movies are full of men who join together or back together for a cause. These are often popular movies because there is something in men that connects with these movies that have a band of brothers.
A band of brothers is a group of men who you do life with. They are part of your everyday life and know the real you. They accept you for who you are and challenge you when you need it. To form a band of brothers, men have to start doing two things:
Get a Heart for a Band
Get a Heart for a Band
There is a truth that all men ascribe to: You have to want it, or you'll find a way to not do it
If you don't see the need for a band of brothersyou won't do the work that is involved
A band of brothers not only helps you live life, it keeps you from the ignorant zone
The ignorant zone is something every man is capable of.
It is where you do self-destructive things because no one calls you on it
Think about your life and how much better it would be with a band of friends who do life with you
To form a band of brothers, you have to start by building connections
You want to form natural connections with other men and let the friendships rise out of that
Stephen Mansfield in his book, "Men on Fire" refers to the indirect connections.
A 2017 study at the University of Oxford showed that men bond better through face-to-face contact and activities, whereas women find it much easier to hold onto an emotional connection through phone conversations.
“What held up [male] friendships was doing stuff together – going to a football match, going to the pub for a drink, playing five-a-side. They had to make the effort. It was a very striking difference between the sexes.”
Connection with men comes from activity
We have to decide if we want a band of brothers, then be willing to be the conduit for connection
Don't expect depth until trust is built
Strong connections take time
Don't expect a quick connection and be willing to work for it
If you have been betrayed before, don't hold that against new people
They didn't cause it and they aren't responsible
Your isolation will only hurt you
As men, we need a band of brothers. If you don't have one, don't beat yourself up or feel shame, just start now trying to build one up. It doesn't have to be in a weird or complicated wya, but in a very natural way. Let friendships develop over time and activities and see who rises up to be part of your band.
Next week we will cover the second part of Forming your band of brothers.
To learn more about Stephen Mansfield and his book Men on Fire, go to www.greatman.tv.