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The title of the blog today probably caused many mixed emotions. Some may have felt anger, fear, agreement, or all of them depending on their background. The point of this week’s blog is not to cause controversy but to state the reasons behind an age old tradition. Guys chasing girls has been a part of our world for as long as their has been a world. I do not think this is because of traditions, but because of design. Guys chasing girls does not cause them to become sexist pigs, quite the opposite. When guys chase the girl, they develop characteristics that help them to mature and become better men. There are many positives that come out of the pursuit. Today we will cover two areas of growth that happen as men chase women.
All men deal with insecurity in one form or fashion. They deal with it in many different ways based on their personality, history and natural gifting, but all men deal with their own insecurity. This is an inner battle and nothing brings it out like having to pursue a woman. They have to put themselves out there and this can scare men to inaction. They need this part of their maturing process to be more effective men. Without it, they will become slaves to their insecurities and their life will reflect their insecurities more than their inner gifts.
Overcoming insecurities is difficult and therefore many men would rather do something else. When they do not have to chase the girl, but are pursued by the girl, they do not see the need to overcome their insecurities. In fact, they get into the habit of letting their insecurities rule their life. The lifestyle of overcoming insecurities through outside means instead of inner growth is very prevalent in our society today. Men have many industries built around the feeding of their insecurities. These industries give them a feeling of virtually overcoming their insecurities, but actually bring no lasting change.
By nature men are usually not super emotionally literate. This has nothing to do with personality or style but how men were designed. They have to learn to read emotions and feel emotions. This is a good thing and it forces men to grow in order to win a woman. Woman want to connect on an emotional level and for a man to really connect, he has to learn how to experience his emotions and express them. This helps him not only win the girl, but helps him in his emotional growth. This makes for a more mature man who is a better leader, husband and father.
When this process is short-circuited, men do not see the need to connect emotionally. This does not mean they are not emotional, but often times their emotions are more appetite based. They become more emotional about things they want or activities they participate in regularly. This produces a man who is a roller coaster of emotions and appetites. As we have raised a generation of men who live life based on their emotions and appetites, we have seen the negative affect on men and society as a whole. We need emotionally literate men and when they pursue women their emotional literacy rises to the surface.
Men who have overcome their insecurities and grown in their emotional abilities help bring stability to our homes and our society as a whole. They are more understanding and will actually treat women better than if they stayed insecure and emotionally ignorant. Our society needs strong men who lead. We need men who have grown up by chasing women.
What do you think? Should guys chase girls?